Editorial

My editorial paper mainly covers how I first stumbled across my topic. It also details my initial view on the subject, and why. I backed up most of my reasoning up until this point with what I had experienced in my own life, and what I had seen around me. I learned that in an editorial paper, crediting a legitimate outside source helps to increase the validity and credibility of your own writing. I am glad that I added in information from an outside source, it helps to make my editorial more informative and less like a rant or commentary. Laws of Attraction Sigmund Freud made several discoveries and developments in the study of the human mind and its functions. Among his many theories that tie childhood experiences to adult behavior, one touches upon what women and men look for in potential mates. There are a number of different factors involved in the equation of human attraction, but Freud proposed the theory that people attempt to recreate their childhoods (Perron). He suggested that girls are attracted to men that remind them of their fathers and boys are attracted to girls that remind them of their mothers. Various sources dispute whether this attraction is grounded purely in physical appearance, characteristics alone, or in a combination of both options. Reasons for the tendency to marry spouses similar to parents can range from comfortable familiarity, righting old wrongs, or reclaiming personal history (Perron). Based on personal observations of my life and the lives of those around me, I believe that Freud’s theory is accurate and that the attraction is based on their mates’ characteristics.

My mother, a psychiatrist, first introduced me to this theory after I experienced a break-up. Initially, I reacted like most people and was mortified by the idea of being attracted to my father. She proceeded to describe the similarity in traits between my dad and this boy. My father has a fantastic sense of humor and a laid back personality. When my mom first started dating my father, he had a hard time being completely emotionally available. I like guys who make me laugh, and most have had issues with emotional availability for various reasons. Humor is one of the most important traits to me in looking for a prospective mate. A guy may not be the best looking, but if he is witty I am more likely to be interested in him. I disagree with those that believe that the parent-mimicking attraction is physically based because most of the guys I am attracted to look nothing like my dad. Since I learned about this concept, I have found evidence of its presence in my relationships and started noting it in my friends and family around me as well.

When I was younger, I had a friend of Chamorro, Japanese, and Hawaiian descent. Because of her background, she is relatively dark in skin tone. One day she told me that when she got older, she would only date boys darker than her because her father is darker than her mother. I stopped and realized that I had never before considered skin tones involved in the many elementary school crushes my friends and I whispered about. I also came to the conclusion that my mother (Hawaiian/Japanese/Chinese) is tanner than my father (Caucasian), and this is completely acceptable to me. Ironically, this friend of mine is currently dating a tall Caucasian guy and they have been together for over two years. Things get interesting when you look beyond the skin color and outward appearance of my friend’s dad and her boyfriend. Both were/are NCAA athletes, have large personalities, and from what I gather are very comfortable being the center of attention. This example reinforces my belief that Freud’s idea is alive and well in human behavior and relationships.

When I attempt to share this theory with others I generally receive an immediate rejection. People automatically find it extremely uncomfortable to even think of potential mates and their parents in the same context. However, once you get past the physicality of attraction, many find the similarities between their dad and boyfriend, or mom and girlfriend, undeniable. If Freud’s theory is accurate, then the next question is why are we attracted to personalities that are similar to our parents? Perhaps it derives from mere exposure and comfort, or the wish to correct what we could not in our youth (Perron). Whatever the explanation may be, Freud was clearly on to something as I as well as a number of other individuals recognize the validity of his idea in various relationships.

Works Cited

Perron, Celeste. "Why You're Likely to Marry Your Parent - CNN." //Featured Articles from CNN//. CNN, 11 Feb. 2009. Web. 11 Nov. 2011. .